I wonder if those who commented even read my piece. You couldn't have. It's a piece expressing love and gratitude for my mentors, my culture, those who gave their lives so I and others can live freely. I encourage young people to express joy and dignity. It's disheartening that response to it has to be so ugly. I guess there are limits to Tolerance even amongst those who align with the Foundation Against Intolerance and Racism.
I'm sorry there hasn't been a warmer response to your essay so far, James. I'm passionate about free speech, I put 2 spaces after a period, and I align with FAIR, just to give you a glimpse of where I'm at, ideologically. I appreciate this article, and the chance to get to know you. I'm also glad you posted the links to some of your other writing, because I LOVE the one titled (I think) "Community Credulity". I feel very similarly, even though I'm a hetero woman. I also appreciate the line you've drawn in the sand about leaving the kids alone. Keep sharing your unique perspective!
Unfortunately a significant portion of FAIR readership seems to consist of racial and sexual bigots who just want to read and be affirmed by stuff from racial and sexual minorities who happen to disagree with some elements of the trending racial and gender ideology.
As for me, I think being proud of whether we are homosexual, bisexual, or heterosexual is silly, but I think it is sensible to be proud of “being out” — that is the history of hatred toward gay people (and bisexual people) warrants pride for having the courage to embrace, publicly, or even privately to some extent, being gay or bi. I think openly celebrating sexual liberation — between consenting individuals (albeit there is some complexity
in that; I’m just not going to get into the weeds) — is something to be proud of given the history of egregious oppression and the presence of people who are still eager to bring that oppression back. As long as a majority of people in the US still revere a book that commands the murder of people who engage in homosexual behavior, there should be pride in celebrating sexual liberation.
Those who were actually part of that movement are remobilizing to fight the Gender fanatics. Your love and gratitude seem so deep that you're blind to the current threat to your culture and the utter betrayal of your mentors. When same-sex attraction is being described as "sexual racism", you are NOT able to live freely. Gay children are routinely put through conversion therapy (aka "gender affirmative care") using your tax dollars. Have you noticed? That's deeply disheartening to me.
Recent surveys have put support for gay marriage at 51%, down from 59%. That's due to the excesses of the gay/queer activists, the sheer perversity of the trans activists, and the reactions to all this by normal folks. The continued forced participation in this garbage by normal people, and their children, will result in continual erosion of support. I know that your views are far less "épater le bourgeois" than many of these queer activists. We bourgeois are no longer willing to be épater.
This piece is based on your opinion about supporting an event that’s been hijacked by Activists. Why is this such a problem for you to admit? As a woman, I fully admit that feminism has turned its back on helping regular gals live their lives on their terms as the movement has become polarized and marginalized by angry, anti family zealots and I want nothing to do with them. The gay movement was about enshrining the
Same rights and privileges which had been previously been denied to their community. And now we are there. Trust me when I say gay kids are the cool ones in school these days. There is room for all of us in this great big world, and we do not need to celebrate one group of people over everyone else. It’s confusing to many, and it creates resentment. Those in my generation who fought against the hostilities and discrimination during the AIDS epidemic in the 80s couldn’t give two hoots about attending today’s PRIDE events, and our younger generation has been inundated with rainbow flags and stickers and drag queens at story hour their entire lives. Your younger coworker in your column is right to express his personal views; it‘s one representative of many in his generation. It’s a pity you envisioned a different response from your column; that doesn’t make us bigots. We’re just tired of being told what to think, and judging all of us under a very narrow lens…maybe that’s your problem to resolve, not ours. All the best, and good day to you.
The gay rights movement came to prominence due to a simple agreement: You may not agree with what we do in private, but it's private. Private behavior for adults should have a lot of flexibility.
In the last 10 years in particular, this bargain has been broken. Now gay behavior is out in public. Gay proponents of drag demand the ability to have access to children, despite the fact that many gays are on the sex offender list. Men who are trans demand the access to female spaces. It's all out in public, and crammed into our faces. I am not happy seeing a bunch of screaming gay guys fonding each other in public and simulating sexual acts during pride.
It's pushed by the trans and queer agendas. With trans, you must accomodate these deluded and deranged people, annd are not allowed to laugh loudly at them, despite the completely ridiculous presentations and obvious confusion. If you "misgender", you are brought up on charges to HR, and sometimes fired.
If gay folks do not want the backlash THAT IS UNDERWAY, the overt public sexually explicit stuff needs to end. No more drag story hour. No more sex acts in public. Do what you want in private - in public you scare the horses and offend normal people.
There are different issues at play here, and based on a quick look you seem to conflate them. I agree people shouldn't do anything sexually explicit in public, but that applies regardless of sexual preference, sexual identification, etc. I hope you agree with that. However, if you have a different standard for what gay people, trans, etc. should do in public vs. others, then that would be, and I'll put it gently, unreasonable.
The gay queer ethos of the moment appears to be "embarrassment of the bourgeoisie" with overt and flagrant PDAs. Now, you see this a little in very immature couples. Not much otherwise in normal hetero couples. But the gay ethos is "stick it in the eye" of the normies. Enough. Get a fucking room.
I don't disagree. Which is why I encourage young people to understand the history and culture they purport to represent and to choose more dignified expressions.
And that is the tradition bargain - private behavior is private. Most people are comfortable with that. I certainly am. Most of my gay friends follow that, as do my straight friends. None of the straight people I know spend time discussing sexual issues, or doing PDAs. Part of it is the difference between long-married people (who do whatever in private) and those still on the market.
I agree with the sentiment, and have always been fully supportive of the gay community. However this entire movement has been captured by ideological factors which no longer reflects the reality of many gay folks. Lesbian groups are no longer welcome to march in Pride parades as Transgender activists call them TERFS. Gay bars - once a haven for gay men and lesbians- are now over run with activists and giggly young women who thinks it’s "fun“ to host their bachelorette party there and post their photos on Instagram.
Everyone has a right to live their life as they see fit here, but when it’s been hijacked by certain ideological activists, maybe it needs to end.
Except that the hijacking by certain ideological activists of gay and lesbian existence for whatever purpose the "Q" and the "T" have in mind, needs to end.
Personally, I find it absurd to be either ashamed, or proud, of one's sexual preference. I get that saying I'm proud feels like a rebuttal to those who think one should be ashamed, but I don't think it's rational to rebut a silly thing by saying an equally silly opposite thing.
Agree fully with this. To need to celebrate what should be only a small part of one’s identity and something that has gained wide acceptance strikes me as somewhat pitiable. And it’s only going to provoke those who will never agree with you. Be proud of those who had the courage to fight for acceptance. But that fight is largely over. And if you think you must still fight until EVERYONE agrees with you, then you are foolish. I have great mentors who were/are gay; I celebrate them for their accomplishments, not their sexual preference!
Just a thought; did you ever consider that no one cares that you are out there? You are the one who seems to need the attention and drama. The rest of us are a little busy living our lives. Be whatever you want but don’t expect others to celebrate with you. No one is cheering my wife and I sleeping together. Just live life to the fullest. Again, others just don’t care or hate you and if they do, they aren’t worth your time and energy.
Sound a bit salty for someone who doesn’t care. “Needs the attention and drama”.
“No one is cheering my wife and I sleeping together. “
You have a “wife” dude. In the US, like in many other places, people are generally raised to believe “marriage” with someone of the other gender is sacred. You were likely cheered on your whole life to have sex with a wife.
Yeah, swing and miss. Worked with and been friends with the alphabet community since I can remember. The point which I guess you missed was, be with who you want but why do you need attention? Do you need validation from others and if so, you need to wonder why?
As for cheering on sex with my wife, not sure how you do things but what happens in our house is our business. It should be the same for everyone. No cheering needed!
If a person doesn’t need “validation from others” they are a freak. Social affirmation is a pillar of psychological well-being for humans that aren’t defects. I don’t think you could have any friends from the “alphabet community” if you are perplexed why humans need attention.
Some people just seem to be wildly ignorant of their own needs, as you appear to be. I hope you enjoy the rest of the day with your hegemonic culture and government sanctioned sexual partner.
I haven't been to pride personally, and I get why people are turned off by it, especially young people. I am 21, I grew up in a time where my high school GSA was filled with students complaining about teachers not respecting their neopronouns. At the same time, there's an undeniable bond that happens between members of our community because nearly all of us have, at one point or another, had to ask if our families' love for us is really unconditional, if they would be able to love the person we're in love with. That's why I love learning about LGBT history. People are eager to find the most lewd image from a pride parade and dismiss it all as crazy and useless, but for young gay, trans, and bisexual folks, we should not forget the lineage of people who fought for our right—my right—to marry who I want and to live in a world where the debate is about whether we still need a parade.
I didn't realize I liked women until the year after gay marriage was legalized, and I don't take that lightly. Everyone who came before me and made that possible has my deepest gratitude and respect.
Thank you! I'm glad my response meant something. I just kept reading the comments thinking about how I would feel if I were on the other end of the dog pile and wanted to make sure you knew you weren't insane and your work got through to at least one person. I'm honestly not sure what's gotten into the FAIR community, but keep doing what you're doing.
ANY group of people can share a story about asking if their family's love is really conditional. MANY families express distaste for their children's partners. Sometimes mild, sometimes severe.
Queer Theory teaches that cis-hets always get unconditional love and acceptance from family, but Queer people must form their own glitter family. This is false. It's a social control technique to bond the group and discourage questions.
I was born in 1974. Grew up around plenty of lesbians, attended same sex marriages before they were legally recognized. The history you've been taught is mostly false. It bears no resemblance to the lived experience of the people who were actually there.
I loved your piece James. It’s solid and conveys my sentiments as a millennial gay man about the importance of pride. Every gay man still has a coming out. Reading some of the commenters does solidify in my mind the need to keep pride going.
It’s fascinating how heterosexual couples take for granted how much they are celebrated from their first relationships, marriage, family support, buying houses, raising children, in church, in counseling, in just about every resource for personal growth taking the perspective of heterosexuality. In the last 3 years I’ve had 8 hetero coworkers use their children as grounds for the need for raises over their childless co-workers. Nothing like a straight boss with kids sympathizing with an employee who just had their first, second, or third kid. Not only do most gay men still wait until after highschool to be “out” but to raise their own family presents nearly unbridgeable hurdles. (Although it is almost certain that just about any well put together gay man in the LGBTQ community will at some point be asked to donate sperm to ladies in want of a family)
I find it very regressive that conservative elements would take to your well balanced pages to vent. This is wrong. You are appreciated James.
Conservatives, libertarians, this is, at best, the place to take credit for how your values of freedom and liberty even encompass people unlike yourself. You will not get balanced and healthy homosexual perspectives if you fill them with the hate that would be smacked down any where else. Take the win for liberty and America instead.
It’s just kind of how it is. You get used to making sure you do certain things very well because you know don’t have other cards in the deck. That’s life.
Life experience and perspective proves otherwise. I’m sure you are very talented but you’re still young. You cannot speak for those on the other side of the fence because you do not live their life. So instead of focusing on others, focus instead on working hard and let your actions, and hard work, speak for you. Over time, you will find out that the actions and opinions of others don’t matter near as much as they do today. All the best.
James, believe me when I say the world knows you all are prideful of who you are. We have heard all of you loud and clear. For most of the rest of us we are indifferent and tired of hearing about it. I do not say this to you to diminish you in any way. The movement has pushed it way too far for far too long. You all are doing your movement a disservice by forcing yourselves on the rest of us, especially our children, in public displays that should be private.
Pretty much the same way I feel about Christians. Just had one come by my house the other day trying to convince me to worship their god of slavery and human sacrifice. They were happy to be around when I was listening to them preach their nonsense, but once I responded with my own views they weren’t interested in listening and were eager to move onto the next house to evangelize their perversion.
Did they call you a Nazi? Threaten to get you fired from work? Threaten to physically harm you for being a heretic? Or did they just shrug and move on?
Shrugging and moving on is how religious freedom works.
I have never been called a Nazi, been threatened to be fired from work, or physically threatened, by any person because I don’t believe transwomen are women. And I’m quite open about it. I write about it in my substack, and even disputed it at work. Literally said I don’t believe in voluntary pronouns to everyone including hr when pronoun labeling was encouraged.
I have though once been told to sign a form affirming a corporations peculiar Christian beliefs before I was officially payrolled. And I have been told that I’d be tortured or exterminated by the imaginary god that Christians worship for not affirming the nonsense that Christians believe. That is a threat, albeit a superstitious one. But when Christians talk about what their “Lord” and “Master” is going to do to people who don’t joyfully become his slaves, they themselves don’t believe it is a superstition. Thus it is a threat.
And the vast majority of congress, who are Christian and are Zionist or sympathetic to Zionism, just slandered every American as anti-Semitic( I.e. Nazi-like racists) including me, when they passed a bill equating anti Zionism with anti-semitism. They slandered everyone who doesn’t affirm their religious beliefs about the right of Zionists to rule Palestine as an ethno-theocratic apartheid state cuz their imaginary slaver god mythologically bequeathed it to Moses and his followers when he commanded them to commit genocide to possess it. Christian Zionists are currently up to lots of shenanigans trying to punish Americans for opposing Israel, the genocidal ethno theocratic state dear to their spiritual heart. That isn’t how religious freedom works.
If we are going to compare the political menace of the postmodern gender cult and the Zionist cult, the latter is going to prove to be egregiously worse. So far the gender cult hasn’t conducted a genocide, either in the ancient mythological past or the 21st century. Although admittedly, some among the gender cult probably would if they had the same power as the Zionist cult. Fortunately, they do not. But the Zionist cult does, and is now committing a genocide.
The gender cultists threatened to blow up the public library in my city because heretics were permitted to speak. Also assaulted two women on the street. Laws have been passed in much of the Anglosphere to criminalize heresy. When a couple of Progress flags were stolen, the police department created an entire blasphemy investigation unit, pulling resources AWAY from investigating physical assaults and murders. There have been multiple prosecutions for leaving skidmarks on a pride flag on the street.
Apparently you don't live in an area controlled by Queer theocracy. I do. Pay attention. The initial stages of the takeover are quite subtle. Prevention is easier than response.
The Queer death count is growing. Push back before it's too late. I would be incredibly relieved if they just shared their faith door-to-door instead of taking over the government and trying to eliminate all other faiths and opinions.
"The Queer death count is growing. Push back before it's too late. I would be incredibly relieved if they just shared their faith door-to-door instead of taking over the government and trying to eliminate all other faiths and opinions."
I was comparing the postmodern gender cult to Christian Zionism. The "death count" of Zionism is conservatively in the hundreds of thousands, given all the U.S. government wars in the middle east that were waged on behalf of Zionist interests and all the chaos and coups. And Zionists are conducting a genocide -- perhaps you missed that point. Threatening to "blow up a public library" is certainly bad, but actually blowing up the majority of public infrastructure, including Universities, of a civilian population is worse, which was just done by Zionists. And the systematic starvation of millions of people is worse than two women being assaulted on the street, even though that is also bad.
I have already written quite a bit about the postmodern gender cult; there is nothing I can be late to when it comes to "pushing back". But again, it is currently insignificant compared to Zionism. Zionists aren't just "sharing their faith door to door instead of taking over the government" -- the government is captured by Zionism -- the legislature and the executive. And they are passing laws to penalize opposition to Zionism and to intimidate critics, while participating in a genocide and using American taxes.
Well, if that's where you want to go with this, you may want to look into some of the funding sources of Queer fanaticism. The two issues are surprisingly intertwined.
Also, you started with a complaint about door-to-door proselytizers, then switched to the extremist aspects of the Israeli government. Moved the goalposts
Just. Stop. Just act like a small L libertarian: do your thing and don’t worry about what anyone else is doing. Don’t do anything that infringes upon someone else, and don’t let anyone infringe upon you.
I read this essay and some of James' other essays. I daresay, I feel we would get along well. I do not pretend to understand homosexuality. It has been with us throughout the history of man. Sometimes it is celebrated. Sometimes it is ostracized. Is there a genetic basis or is it culturally and societally determined? Is it some of both? I don't know or particularly care. I was raised to see every individual as a child of God, precious in His eyes (I use the masculine pronoun out of convention), and deserving of respect and fair treatment. I have colleagues, friends, and family members who are gay. All are valued. There is something about being gay that I cannot identify that is profoundly different. The defining characteristic of gayness, same sex attraction, is foreign to me and, frankly, distasteful, such that I cannot comprehend how anyone would feel this attraction and be unable to feel attracted to a woman (or vice versa). I have male friends who I love as brothers and have never felt the slightest sexual attraction toward any of them. Fine. There is room for everyone and, ultimately, God judges us; we are not to be the judges lest we some day be judged according to the standards we used to judge others. That said, I am no fan of an entire month to celebrate pride and especially since it seems most of the celebrating is carried on by the extreme elements of the LGBTQ++++ community. The concept of a cohesive LGBTQ++++ "family" is a logical incoherence. Those who claim to be trans, queer, non-binary, or whatever else is out there are not in lockstep with the gay community. The essence of the argument of gay people, as I understand it, is that this is not a choice. It is built into their nature just as heterosexuality is integral to the nature of 95%+ of humanity. It is also binary. Gay men are men, and gay women are women. None claims to be something else entirely. The others in the LGBTQ++++ make the exact opposite claim- binary sex does not exist in reality; it is a construct and you are whatever you say you are and the rest of the world had darn well better accept that and even celebrate that. This I cannot accept. Why does LGBTQ++++ (the pluses just seem to be increasing to cover more and more aberrations under the same umbrella) have to have an entire month of celebration? This seems excessive overcorrection by any standard. Where does it end? Pride? While I agree with James that there are good reasons for the gay community to be proud of their successes, any good thing can become too much. Pride is one of the seven deadly sins and the saying "pride goeth before a fall" is a caution against elevating pride too high. Enough with a month long bacchanalia celebrating pride at being gay, queer, or whatever. Which brings me to the pride flag. Gilbert Baker's original flag did not represent any racial or sexual orientation/gender (the pink stripe represented sex and love, not gender identity). The progressive pride flag includes new stripes- black, brown, and light blue- representing trans, queers, and races. Rather than a uniting force, has become a divisive force to those who disagree with the aggressive queer/non-binary agenda to overturn traditional binary sex. A little pride goes a long way......................
Wow, the response of an intelligent stunted person. Throw claims and scream at the sky. Someone disagrees and they are the bad person. Sure hope you find peace someday as you know nothing about who you claim to be able to judge.
I am not sex or gender diverse, but of course I don't "question why veterans, mothers, and fathers (whose impact and contributions to society are far-reaching and selfless) warrant only a day of celebration, while those who publicly affirm their sexual orientation or gender identity are gifted with an entire month?" Veterans, mothers and fathers have ALWAYS been celebrated. Just look at the author blurbs in high school literature textbooks. They will mention an opposite-dender spouse and often children and even mofe often veteran status. They are, however, deceptively silent on male authors who loved men, female authors who loved women, or authors who did not confrom to "gender norms" in other ways. This is beginning to changea tiny, tiny bit, but by no means is the change universal. Sexual minority people aren't "giften" Pride Month; they have earned it through centuried or erasure.
"Last year, Pride was marked by “unprecedented backlash.... Pride flags at a business that has supported Pride Month for years and never had 'an incident like this' happen before....For the first time in a decade, non-LGBT Americans told pollsters that they’re “less comfortable with their LGBT neighbors.” Hmmmm.... where else have we seen a similar phenomenon? Ah,, yes--in the last days of the Weimar Republic. And we all know where that led.
Finally, your term "victim basket" is inaccurate. "Erasure" basket might be more appropriate.
For the record, and for those interested: I've been very clear in my writings about my views regarding "queer" culture for kids: https://jamesbeaman.substack.com/p/what-is-kid-friendly-gay-culture
Also my feelings about the Progressive Pride flag and much of what it represents: https://jamesbeaman.substack.com/p/flagging
And the LGBTQ+ community: https://jamesbeaman.substack.com/p/community-credulity
Thanks for helping me to understand.
I wonder if those who commented even read my piece. You couldn't have. It's a piece expressing love and gratitude for my mentors, my culture, those who gave their lives so I and others can live freely. I encourage young people to express joy and dignity. It's disheartening that response to it has to be so ugly. I guess there are limits to Tolerance even amongst those who align with the Foundation Against Intolerance and Racism.
I'm sorry there hasn't been a warmer response to your essay so far, James. I'm passionate about free speech, I put 2 spaces after a period, and I align with FAIR, just to give you a glimpse of where I'm at, ideologically. I appreciate this article, and the chance to get to know you. I'm also glad you posted the links to some of your other writing, because I LOVE the one titled (I think) "Community Credulity". I feel very similarly, even though I'm a hetero woman. I also appreciate the line you've drawn in the sand about leaving the kids alone. Keep sharing your unique perspective!
Unfortunately a significant portion of FAIR readership seems to consist of racial and sexual bigots who just want to read and be affirmed by stuff from racial and sexual minorities who happen to disagree with some elements of the trending racial and gender ideology.
As for me, I think being proud of whether we are homosexual, bisexual, or heterosexual is silly, but I think it is sensible to be proud of “being out” — that is the history of hatred toward gay people (and bisexual people) warrants pride for having the courage to embrace, publicly, or even privately to some extent, being gay or bi. I think openly celebrating sexual liberation — between consenting individuals (albeit there is some complexity
in that; I’m just not going to get into the weeds) — is something to be proud of given the history of egregious oppression and the presence of people who are still eager to bring that oppression back. As long as a majority of people in the US still revere a book that commands the murder of people who engage in homosexual behavior, there should be pride in celebrating sexual liberation.
You have certainly hit the nail on the head here, Jeffrey--both about FAIR and about pride.
Those who were actually part of that movement are remobilizing to fight the Gender fanatics. Your love and gratitude seem so deep that you're blind to the current threat to your culture and the utter betrayal of your mentors. When same-sex attraction is being described as "sexual racism", you are NOT able to live freely. Gay children are routinely put through conversion therapy (aka "gender affirmative care") using your tax dollars. Have you noticed? That's deeply disheartening to me.
Enjoy your party. It comes at a hell of a cost.
Recent surveys have put support for gay marriage at 51%, down from 59%. That's due to the excesses of the gay/queer activists, the sheer perversity of the trans activists, and the reactions to all this by normal folks. The continued forced participation in this garbage by normal people, and their children, will result in continual erosion of support. I know that your views are far less "épater le bourgeois" than many of these queer activists. We bourgeois are no longer willing to be épater.
This piece is based on your opinion about supporting an event that’s been hijacked by Activists. Why is this such a problem for you to admit? As a woman, I fully admit that feminism has turned its back on helping regular gals live their lives on their terms as the movement has become polarized and marginalized by angry, anti family zealots and I want nothing to do with them. The gay movement was about enshrining the
Same rights and privileges which had been previously been denied to their community. And now we are there. Trust me when I say gay kids are the cool ones in school these days. There is room for all of us in this great big world, and we do not need to celebrate one group of people over everyone else. It’s confusing to many, and it creates resentment. Those in my generation who fought against the hostilities and discrimination during the AIDS epidemic in the 80s couldn’t give two hoots about attending today’s PRIDE events, and our younger generation has been inundated with rainbow flags and stickers and drag queens at story hour their entire lives. Your younger coworker in your column is right to express his personal views; it‘s one representative of many in his generation. It’s a pity you envisioned a different response from your column; that doesn’t make us bigots. We’re just tired of being told what to think, and judging all of us under a very narrow lens…maybe that’s your problem to resolve, not ours. All the best, and good day to you.
This is what is being done to young gay men.
https://open.substack.com/pub/colinwright/p/the-impossible-space?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android&r=1n4twr
I used to support pride. No longer.
The gay rights movement came to prominence due to a simple agreement: You may not agree with what we do in private, but it's private. Private behavior for adults should have a lot of flexibility.
In the last 10 years in particular, this bargain has been broken. Now gay behavior is out in public. Gay proponents of drag demand the ability to have access to children, despite the fact that many gays are on the sex offender list. Men who are trans demand the access to female spaces. It's all out in public, and crammed into our faces. I am not happy seeing a bunch of screaming gay guys fonding each other in public and simulating sexual acts during pride.
It's pushed by the trans and queer agendas. With trans, you must accomodate these deluded and deranged people, annd are not allowed to laugh loudly at them, despite the completely ridiculous presentations and obvious confusion. If you "misgender", you are brought up on charges to HR, and sometimes fired.
If gay folks do not want the backlash THAT IS UNDERWAY, the overt public sexually explicit stuff needs to end. No more drag story hour. No more sex acts in public. Do what you want in private - in public you scare the horses and offend normal people.
There are different issues at play here, and based on a quick look you seem to conflate them. I agree people shouldn't do anything sexually explicit in public, but that applies regardless of sexual preference, sexual identification, etc. I hope you agree with that. However, if you have a different standard for what gay people, trans, etc. should do in public vs. others, then that would be, and I'll put it gently, unreasonable.
The gay queer ethos of the moment appears to be "embarrassment of the bourgeoisie" with overt and flagrant PDAs. Now, you see this a little in very immature couples. Not much otherwise in normal hetero couples. But the gay ethos is "stick it in the eye" of the normies. Enough. Get a fucking room.
I don't disagree. Which is why I encourage young people to understand the history and culture they purport to represent and to choose more dignified expressions.
And that is the tradition bargain - private behavior is private. Most people are comfortable with that. I certainly am. Most of my gay friends follow that, as do my straight friends. None of the straight people I know spend time discussing sexual issues, or doing PDAs. Part of it is the difference between long-married people (who do whatever in private) and those still on the market.
A quick look might not give you the point I was making… hope you read deeper. I was not advocating for sexual explicit behavior in public.
You should re-read my reply.
Wtf is this garbage?
“Gay proponents of drag demand the ability to have access to children, despite the fact that many gays are on the sex offender list.”
Heterosexual proponents of Jesus demand the ability to have access to children, despite the fact that many heterosexuals are on the sex offender list.
Your moral logic is fuking stupid. Certainly nothing to be Proud of.
I'll put you down for the Pedo Patrol. Have fun!!
Huh? Pedo Patrol? What is that? A bunch of pedophiles patrolling something? You part of that? I’m not interested.
I agree with the sentiment, and have always been fully supportive of the gay community. However this entire movement has been captured by ideological factors which no longer reflects the reality of many gay folks. Lesbian groups are no longer welcome to march in Pride parades as Transgender activists call them TERFS. Gay bars - once a haven for gay men and lesbians- are now over run with activists and giggly young women who thinks it’s "fun“ to host their bachelorette party there and post their photos on Instagram.
Everyone has a right to live their life as they see fit here, but when it’s been hijacked by certain ideological activists, maybe it needs to end.
Agreed.
Except that the hijacking by certain ideological activists of gay and lesbian existence for whatever purpose the "Q" and the "T" have in mind, needs to end.
Not maybe, but definitely.
Personally, I find it absurd to be either ashamed, or proud, of one's sexual preference. I get that saying I'm proud feels like a rebuttal to those who think one should be ashamed, but I don't think it's rational to rebut a silly thing by saying an equally silly opposite thing.
Agree fully with this. To need to celebrate what should be only a small part of one’s identity and something that has gained wide acceptance strikes me as somewhat pitiable. And it’s only going to provoke those who will never agree with you. Be proud of those who had the courage to fight for acceptance. But that fight is largely over. And if you think you must still fight until EVERYONE agrees with you, then you are foolish. I have great mentors who were/are gay; I celebrate them for their accomplishments, not their sexual preference!
PS Richard Chamberlain rocks.
He definitely does.
Pride is fine. A day and a parade. Not a month.
What is not fine is when gays allow it to be captured by BLM, trans radicals, fetishists, ...
Just a thought; did you ever consider that no one cares that you are out there? You are the one who seems to need the attention and drama. The rest of us are a little busy living our lives. Be whatever you want but don’t expect others to celebrate with you. No one is cheering my wife and I sleeping together. Just live life to the fullest. Again, others just don’t care or hate you and if they do, they aren’t worth your time and energy.
Sound a bit salty for someone who doesn’t care. “Needs the attention and drama”.
“No one is cheering my wife and I sleeping together. “
You have a “wife” dude. In the US, like in many other places, people are generally raised to believe “marriage” with someone of the other gender is sacred. You were likely cheered on your whole life to have sex with a wife.
Cultural oblivion.
Yeah, swing and miss. Worked with and been friends with the alphabet community since I can remember. The point which I guess you missed was, be with who you want but why do you need attention? Do you need validation from others and if so, you need to wonder why?
As for cheering on sex with my wife, not sure how you do things but what happens in our house is our business. It should be the same for everyone. No cheering needed!
If a person doesn’t need “validation from others” they are a freak. Social affirmation is a pillar of psychological well-being for humans that aren’t defects. I don’t think you could have any friends from the “alphabet community” if you are perplexed why humans need attention.
Some people just seem to be wildly ignorant of their own needs, as you appear to be. I hope you enjoy the rest of the day with your hegemonic culture and government sanctioned sexual partner.
I am open to recommendations!
I haven't been to pride personally, and I get why people are turned off by it, especially young people. I am 21, I grew up in a time where my high school GSA was filled with students complaining about teachers not respecting their neopronouns. At the same time, there's an undeniable bond that happens between members of our community because nearly all of us have, at one point or another, had to ask if our families' love for us is really unconditional, if they would be able to love the person we're in love with. That's why I love learning about LGBT history. People are eager to find the most lewd image from a pride parade and dismiss it all as crazy and useless, but for young gay, trans, and bisexual folks, we should not forget the lineage of people who fought for our right—my right—to marry who I want and to live in a world where the debate is about whether we still need a parade.
I didn't realize I liked women until the year after gay marriage was legalized, and I don't take that lightly. Everyone who came before me and made that possible has my deepest gratitude and respect.
Clare—THANK YOU for getting what I was trying to communicate here.
Dear Clare--I thought you should read my piece reacting to the commentary I received on this essay, as your affirmative response really uplifted me and made me more optimistic for the future. Thank you. https://open.substack.com/pub/jamesbeaman/p/the-limits-of-tolerance?r=1vm74d&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web
Thank you! I'm glad my response meant something. I just kept reading the comments thinking about how I would feel if I were on the other end of the dog pile and wanted to make sure you knew you weren't insane and your work got through to at least one person. I'm honestly not sure what's gotten into the FAIR community, but keep doing what you're doing.
ANY group of people can share a story about asking if their family's love is really conditional. MANY families express distaste for their children's partners. Sometimes mild, sometimes severe.
Queer Theory teaches that cis-hets always get unconditional love and acceptance from family, but Queer people must form their own glitter family. This is false. It's a social control technique to bond the group and discourage questions.
I was born in 1974. Grew up around plenty of lesbians, attended same sex marriages before they were legally recognized. The history you've been taught is mostly false. It bears no resemblance to the lived experience of the people who were actually there.
I still have the ticket stub from my first Pride Festival. It was in West Hollywood, CA in 1984. It was called Christopher Street West.
I loved your piece James. It’s solid and conveys my sentiments as a millennial gay man about the importance of pride. Every gay man still has a coming out. Reading some of the commenters does solidify in my mind the need to keep pride going.
It’s fascinating how heterosexual couples take for granted how much they are celebrated from their first relationships, marriage, family support, buying houses, raising children, in church, in counseling, in just about every resource for personal growth taking the perspective of heterosexuality. In the last 3 years I’ve had 8 hetero coworkers use their children as grounds for the need for raises over their childless co-workers. Nothing like a straight boss with kids sympathizing with an employee who just had their first, second, or third kid. Not only do most gay men still wait until after highschool to be “out” but to raise their own family presents nearly unbridgeable hurdles. (Although it is almost certain that just about any well put together gay man in the LGBTQ community will at some point be asked to donate sperm to ladies in want of a family)
I find it very regressive that conservative elements would take to your well balanced pages to vent. This is wrong. You are appreciated James.
Conservatives, libertarians, this is, at best, the place to take credit for how your values of freedom and liberty even encompass people unlike yourself. You will not get balanced and healthy homosexual perspectives if you fill them with the hate that would be smacked down any where else. Take the win for liberty and America instead.
That’s a bit twisted. Maybe your coworker asked for a raise because he worked harder. Be careful how you frame your arguments.
It’s just kind of how it is. You get used to making sure you do certain things very well because you know don’t have other cards in the deck. That’s life.
Life experience and perspective proves otherwise. I’m sure you are very talented but you’re still young. You cannot speak for those on the other side of the fence because you do not live their life. So instead of focusing on others, focus instead on working hard and let your actions, and hard work, speak for you. Over time, you will find out that the actions and opinions of others don’t matter near as much as they do today. All the best.
Thank you Tara. Very kind.
Thank you! Take care.
What a beautiful, soulful, heartfelt piece. Thank you for being willing to share, with such grace. May we all rise to this level of humanity.
Love you! Let's all listen more, react less, and see ourselves in each other. xoxo
James, believe me when I say the world knows you all are prideful of who you are. We have heard all of you loud and clear. For most of the rest of us we are indifferent and tired of hearing about it. I do not say this to you to diminish you in any way. The movement has pushed it way too far for far too long. You all are doing your movement a disservice by forcing yourselves on the rest of us, especially our children, in public displays that should be private.
I wish you your best life.
Pretty much the same way I feel about Christians. Just had one come by my house the other day trying to convince me to worship their god of slavery and human sacrifice. They were happy to be around when I was listening to them preach their nonsense, but once I responded with my own views they weren’t interested in listening and were eager to move onto the next house to evangelize their perversion.
Did they call you a Nazi? Threaten to get you fired from work? Threaten to physically harm you for being a heretic? Or did they just shrug and move on?
Shrugging and moving on is how religious freedom works.
I have never been called a Nazi, been threatened to be fired from work, or physically threatened, by any person because I don’t believe transwomen are women. And I’m quite open about it. I write about it in my substack, and even disputed it at work. Literally said I don’t believe in voluntary pronouns to everyone including hr when pronoun labeling was encouraged.
I have though once been told to sign a form affirming a corporations peculiar Christian beliefs before I was officially payrolled. And I have been told that I’d be tortured or exterminated by the imaginary god that Christians worship for not affirming the nonsense that Christians believe. That is a threat, albeit a superstitious one. But when Christians talk about what their “Lord” and “Master” is going to do to people who don’t joyfully become his slaves, they themselves don’t believe it is a superstition. Thus it is a threat.
And the vast majority of congress, who are Christian and are Zionist or sympathetic to Zionism, just slandered every American as anti-Semitic( I.e. Nazi-like racists) including me, when they passed a bill equating anti Zionism with anti-semitism. They slandered everyone who doesn’t affirm their religious beliefs about the right of Zionists to rule Palestine as an ethno-theocratic apartheid state cuz their imaginary slaver god mythologically bequeathed it to Moses and his followers when he commanded them to commit genocide to possess it. Christian Zionists are currently up to lots of shenanigans trying to punish Americans for opposing Israel, the genocidal ethno theocratic state dear to their spiritual heart. That isn’t how religious freedom works.
If we are going to compare the political menace of the postmodern gender cult and the Zionist cult, the latter is going to prove to be egregiously worse. So far the gender cult hasn’t conducted a genocide, either in the ancient mythological past or the 21st century. Although admittedly, some among the gender cult probably would if they had the same power as the Zionist cult. Fortunately, they do not. But the Zionist cult does, and is now committing a genocide.
The gender cultists threatened to blow up the public library in my city because heretics were permitted to speak. Also assaulted two women on the street. Laws have been passed in much of the Anglosphere to criminalize heresy. When a couple of Progress flags were stolen, the police department created an entire blasphemy investigation unit, pulling resources AWAY from investigating physical assaults and murders. There have been multiple prosecutions for leaving skidmarks on a pride flag on the street.
Apparently you don't live in an area controlled by Queer theocracy. I do. Pay attention. The initial stages of the takeover are quite subtle. Prevention is easier than response.
The Queer death count is growing. Push back before it's too late. I would be incredibly relieved if they just shared their faith door-to-door instead of taking over the government and trying to eliminate all other faiths and opinions.
"The Queer death count is growing. Push back before it's too late. I would be incredibly relieved if they just shared their faith door-to-door instead of taking over the government and trying to eliminate all other faiths and opinions."
I was comparing the postmodern gender cult to Christian Zionism. The "death count" of Zionism is conservatively in the hundreds of thousands, given all the U.S. government wars in the middle east that were waged on behalf of Zionist interests and all the chaos and coups. And Zionists are conducting a genocide -- perhaps you missed that point. Threatening to "blow up a public library" is certainly bad, but actually blowing up the majority of public infrastructure, including Universities, of a civilian population is worse, which was just done by Zionists. And the systematic starvation of millions of people is worse than two women being assaulted on the street, even though that is also bad.
I have already written quite a bit about the postmodern gender cult; there is nothing I can be late to when it comes to "pushing back". But again, it is currently insignificant compared to Zionism. Zionists aren't just "sharing their faith door to door instead of taking over the government" -- the government is captured by Zionism -- the legislature and the executive. And they are passing laws to penalize opposition to Zionism and to intimidate critics, while participating in a genocide and using American taxes.
Well, if that's where you want to go with this, you may want to look into some of the funding sources of Queer fanaticism. The two issues are surprisingly intertwined.
Also, you started with a complaint about door-to-door proselytizers, then switched to the extremist aspects of the Israeli government. Moved the goalposts
Just. Stop. Just act like a small L libertarian: do your thing and don’t worry about what anyone else is doing. Don’t do anything that infringes upon someone else, and don’t let anyone infringe upon you.
I read this essay and some of James' other essays. I daresay, I feel we would get along well. I do not pretend to understand homosexuality. It has been with us throughout the history of man. Sometimes it is celebrated. Sometimes it is ostracized. Is there a genetic basis or is it culturally and societally determined? Is it some of both? I don't know or particularly care. I was raised to see every individual as a child of God, precious in His eyes (I use the masculine pronoun out of convention), and deserving of respect and fair treatment. I have colleagues, friends, and family members who are gay. All are valued. There is something about being gay that I cannot identify that is profoundly different. The defining characteristic of gayness, same sex attraction, is foreign to me and, frankly, distasteful, such that I cannot comprehend how anyone would feel this attraction and be unable to feel attracted to a woman (or vice versa). I have male friends who I love as brothers and have never felt the slightest sexual attraction toward any of them. Fine. There is room for everyone and, ultimately, God judges us; we are not to be the judges lest we some day be judged according to the standards we used to judge others. That said, I am no fan of an entire month to celebrate pride and especially since it seems most of the celebrating is carried on by the extreme elements of the LGBTQ++++ community. The concept of a cohesive LGBTQ++++ "family" is a logical incoherence. Those who claim to be trans, queer, non-binary, or whatever else is out there are not in lockstep with the gay community. The essence of the argument of gay people, as I understand it, is that this is not a choice. It is built into their nature just as heterosexuality is integral to the nature of 95%+ of humanity. It is also binary. Gay men are men, and gay women are women. None claims to be something else entirely. The others in the LGBTQ++++ make the exact opposite claim- binary sex does not exist in reality; it is a construct and you are whatever you say you are and the rest of the world had darn well better accept that and even celebrate that. This I cannot accept. Why does LGBTQ++++ (the pluses just seem to be increasing to cover more and more aberrations under the same umbrella) have to have an entire month of celebration? This seems excessive overcorrection by any standard. Where does it end? Pride? While I agree with James that there are good reasons for the gay community to be proud of their successes, any good thing can become too much. Pride is one of the seven deadly sins and the saying "pride goeth before a fall" is a caution against elevating pride too high. Enough with a month long bacchanalia celebrating pride at being gay, queer, or whatever. Which brings me to the pride flag. Gilbert Baker's original flag did not represent any racial or sexual orientation/gender (the pink stripe represented sex and love, not gender identity). The progressive pride flag includes new stripes- black, brown, and light blue- representing trans, queers, and races. Rather than a uniting force, has become a divisive force to those who disagree with the aggressive queer/non-binary agenda to overturn traditional binary sex. A little pride goes a long way......................
Wow, the response of an intelligent stunted person. Throw claims and scream at the sky. Someone disagrees and they are the bad person. Sure hope you find peace someday as you know nothing about who you claim to be able to judge.
I am not sex or gender diverse, but of course I don't "question why veterans, mothers, and fathers (whose impact and contributions to society are far-reaching and selfless) warrant only a day of celebration, while those who publicly affirm their sexual orientation or gender identity are gifted with an entire month?" Veterans, mothers and fathers have ALWAYS been celebrated. Just look at the author blurbs in high school literature textbooks. They will mention an opposite-dender spouse and often children and even mofe often veteran status. They are, however, deceptively silent on male authors who loved men, female authors who loved women, or authors who did not confrom to "gender norms" in other ways. This is beginning to changea tiny, tiny bit, but by no means is the change universal. Sexual minority people aren't "giften" Pride Month; they have earned it through centuried or erasure.
"Last year, Pride was marked by “unprecedented backlash.... Pride flags at a business that has supported Pride Month for years and never had 'an incident like this' happen before....For the first time in a decade, non-LGBT Americans told pollsters that they’re “less comfortable with their LGBT neighbors.” Hmmmm.... where else have we seen a similar phenomenon? Ah,, yes--in the last days of the Weimar Republic. And we all know where that led.
Finally, your term "victim basket" is inaccurate. "Erasure" basket might be more appropriate.