When going thru a very dark time, I fell upon a message from Jesus: "I don't allow this to happen to hurt you. It is to strengthen you." But we need constant reminders to not give up. This essay was a beautiful example. Thank you, continued prayers for this journey.
I know Mary personally and respect and regard her beyond measure. While we may not agree on every opinion, why should we, or even strive to? Debate like art is by design meant to expand our thinking, challenge our assumptions and especially those ways of thinking we were merely exposed to in our formative years. It should allow and encourage us to decide for ourselves, then rethink and decide again. When did we lose the ability to respect others opinions and thoughtfully consider them, whether or not we agree with them, before or after the considering? How do we regain that for our communities?
Thank you for sharing your story. I have been aware of you for a long time on X but only knew bits and pieces of what happened to you. Honestly, I could barely read this. It was so painful.
Thank you for sharing your courage and RESILIENCE. It’s amazing how cruel the #bekind folks can be.
I only read through the first couple of cancellations, ten or so paragraphs, and the entire thing was predictable. The medium is theater in this instance, and has been well told in Arthur Miller's Crucible.
Humans for some reason are prone to some sort of mass craziness where they banish the heretic, and heresy can mean anything at all, the use of the wrong pronoun, wearing the wrong color, literally anything. Waiting for a society or an art form to come to its senses is a waste of time, better to make a change. Similar happened in 2019 at, of all things, a website for knitting called Ravelry.
The fever hasn't yet left America, or Europe, let's just hope the cure is less worse than the disease.
Yes, there's no reason to spend time with this crowd, to be sure, but rather to insist on telling one's stories, or making one's art, in other venues more welcoming, and that hold with the fundaments of our country, freedom of speech and from compelled speech chief among them. Thank God FAIR incubates writers and artists of all kinds, who can find footing here and then take their work out into the wider world. This much is true: we must keep showing up, standing up, and speaking up. The tail end of the essay describes my way forward, and I hope others find their way, too. FAIR is an important aid in this regard.
I am sorry that this happened to you. I have never forgotten the high school lessons about the punishment of exile within indigenous communities, and the certain death exile invited.
Cancellation and all that flows from it is, if not physical death, a disabling attack on the spirit.
Some do not recover.
Yet! A writer and artist is a poor target for such punishments. Consider Dante Alighieri's political persecution.
A scientist and philosopher is an even more ferocious adversary of the thought persecutors than an artist.
"E pur si muove." Let Galileo's commitment to truth become your own.
I have a practice of always translating the Latin so as to be as helpful as possible, and to not elevate myself at the cost of others. "And yet it moves," which is a beautiful rebuke, was Galileo's vow to maintain the truth in the face of all persecution. Though, I don't know that a competition for who is the most hounded -- practitioners of science, philosophy, the arts -- is useful to us as a culture. Looked at realistically, each individual harried by the brutal left experiences it at the 100% mark, so the torment, man-to-man, is equal. Research for my next essay, specifically on "Soul Murder," included this focus on an indigenous community, which you might find interesting. https://arena.org.au/smashing-grabbing-falling/
You are not alone. In one or another way, many are experiencing the same thing. After Bush 2 and later COVID and now with the destruction of Gaza, I have come to the realization that what I am in desperate need of is art. I'm not religious but art and Jungian/depth psychology help me now. Are essential. The struggle of our times is to refuse to give up our humanity. Without art we are lost.
The majority conform; the artist does not because she CANNOT. By definition. You may need to create a new art form to use or change the way you are doing it. Why do you need a physical performance space? Can you do these readings online? If it's not too expensive, I'm interested. And please get off FB. It's extremely unhealthy. The push against the billionaire bros REQUIRES artists. This is your time. Do not give up. Ignore the little gnats. I'm a TERF and proud of it.
I agree with this. When I was cancelled from the business world I felt similarly upset, doubly so since my value was mathematically and empirically provable. (Analysis here to those that are interested. https://questioner.substack.com/p/superforecasting-for-dummies-9a5 )
But I resolved that I wasn't going to let the haters bring me down. They were my moral and intellectual inferiors, and if anything, THEY deserved to be the ones who are brought down, along with their backwards moral regime. I've been working on that for a while now, and it's great to know that there are other like-minded people like me out there who think the same way I do.
It is very nice to discover fellow travelers, to be sure! Thanks for your comment. I appreciate the multiplier "doubly so," as it frames your mathematical lens, though I dispute the assertion: everyone's cancelation is their own, and given the experience is 100% devastating, it's impossible for the next fellow's to best it at 200%. And anyway, it's a kindness to assume the pain is shared equally, and rational to believe there's no race. The others are trying to take so much of "us" from ourselves; surely the mutual protection what remains is better than a wobbly formula of measure? "Empirically provable" is important and has come under attack from the left, basic biology being a favorite target -- I love it when we can come back with facts for our arguments, to be sure. Equally -- through my lens -- I love it when a story can be told of the sin committed and the hope of our redemption, speaking in narrative terms here, that move hearts and minds to battle this scourge.
Sorry, I didn't mean to imply that the discrimination against you was less significant or painful. I simply meant that it's less PROVABLE, whereas the discrimination against me can be easily quantified into hard numbers and facts. That's one of the advantages business has over art ;-)
Gotcha! I appreciate the wry smile regarding the advantages of business over art. Can't argue there! Wishing you a blessed new year and greater happiness and contentment for us all.
I still believe you can create. The rest of the world is waking up to the sick narcissistic psychopaths that compromise so much of the 'woke'. Thanks to the filthy animals that pursued you so relentlessly, art sucks now. I almost never go the movies. Never read a new novel. It's all woke social justice crap. Even Disney can't make a good movie anymore. All because they let themselves be told what to do by a bunch of angry females (we have reason to suspect) ruling the world as cowards behind anonymous accounts.
If Donald Trump wants to round these people up and stick 'em in the Saharan desert, it would be good for them. Let them learn what *real* oppression is like. Good luck with that pronoun thing with Sudanese warlords.
Thank you so much Mary for your voice and speaking up and out about cancellation. I've been cancelled by more friends and family than I can count. The hardest, most painful cancellation was being shunned by my daughters for not believing in gender ideology and medicalization of my youngest daughter's body. I'm going through a dark time, and your voice gave me strength today. Thank you.
You're an inspiration, Mary. I'm delighted to know that Brent Morden was a help, since he's wonderful guy; and I'm tickled to know that Albert Murray, one of my favorite blues writers and thinkers, has become a part of your personal journey. Murray's "Stomping the Blues," BTW, is just as helpful a guidebook to perseverance and eventual triumph as "The Hero and the Blues." I've just read through your first two essays, in order, so that I could appreciate this one. It's clear that life has thrown you some terrible challenges, but I think you're right to embrace the "but anyway" philosophical orientation of the blues--the "I'm beaten down and want to quit, but I'm going to keep on anyway." I don't know if this will help, but I've written several essays about the blues ethos--the philosophical orientation Murray is evoking--and here's one of them. I'll repeat: you're an inspiration, and a hero, for walking this path and sharing the deep pain out of which your own stubborn determination to persist have emerged. https://studythesouth.org/blues-expressiveness-and-the-blues-ethos/ It's a long essay, so if it drags for you, cut ahead to Part 4: A Brutally Honest Recognition of Reality.
Oh my -- "but anyway" -- !! My new favorite phrase. Thank you!
From Murray's writing, I know you saw this quote, embedded close to the end of the third essay: "The leftist theater community on both coasts of this country stole my storytelling and imperiled my life. But since every day, as Murray told one interviewer, 'is like either … cut your throat or be down at the Savoy [Ballroom] by 9:30,' I’m going to pick up my sword, thank God for antagonistic cooperation, and tell this story: What this movement does is immoral and base, a cowardly, carnivorous thing. Many thousands of artists are suffering because of it. It has malignant intentions for our country, and will rot the heart of us to achieve them."
Isn't that just amazing? For us fellow travelers, it's like either "cut our throats or be down at the stage, or behind the mic, or at the keyboard, or in the cafe, or around the kitchen table by 9:30..." right? Bless you for the endurance to read all three stories, and most especially for your very kind words. They nourish beyond expression. And I am so so eager to read your work and shall do this right now over my next cup of coffee. Because when it comes to Albert Murray -- as of now, and thanks to Brent... I'm with that angel band.
Thanks once more. We got this, and we rise together.
Careful whatcha wish for! :-) I'm consuming your essay like I do cornbread and collard greens right now. Back later with my thoughts. Thank you once more.
I am truly sorry that you experienced depression, thoughts of suicide and violent threats. At the same time I wonder how that hasn’t made you more empathic to those who you refuse to acknowledge how they choose to identify. You insult those who who disagree with you and continue down the path of discrimination and oppression of a community that just wants to be acknowledged and seen instead of realizing that your actions and views contribute greatly to your not being hired. One cannot refuse to treat others with respect and value and yet expect it for themselves. Be better and you will reap the rewards.
Men who wish to dress as women may do so if they please, and must be free from harassment; the same is true for women who wish to dress as men. Both may call themselves whatever they like, and engage in relationship with any consenting adult they wish. All lives matter, and all must be allowed to live their best life in peace and security.
I am not concerned with being hired any longer, and am grateful that it was taken from me so as to enable the enlargement of my last voice. I'm content -- in truth, well past content. I am on my final purpose. Everything has lead to here. I wish the same for you. It makes life shine, no matter who tries to quench the light.
When going thru a very dark time, I fell upon a message from Jesus: "I don't allow this to happen to hurt you. It is to strengthen you." But we need constant reminders to not give up. This essay was a beautiful example. Thank you, continued prayers for this journey.
I know Mary personally and respect and regard her beyond measure. While we may not agree on every opinion, why should we, or even strive to? Debate like art is by design meant to expand our thinking, challenge our assumptions and especially those ways of thinking we were merely exposed to in our formative years. It should allow and encourage us to decide for ourselves, then rethink and decide again. When did we lose the ability to respect others opinions and thoughtfully consider them, whether or not we agree with them, before or after the considering? How do we regain that for our communities?
Thank you, my dear friend.
Thank you for sharing your story. I have been aware of you for a long time on X but only knew bits and pieces of what happened to you. Honestly, I could barely read this. It was so painful.
Thank you for sharing your courage and RESILIENCE. It’s amazing how cruel the #bekind folks can be.
Thank goodness for FAIR.
I only read through the first couple of cancellations, ten or so paragraphs, and the entire thing was predictable. The medium is theater in this instance, and has been well told in Arthur Miller's Crucible.
Humans for some reason are prone to some sort of mass craziness where they banish the heretic, and heresy can mean anything at all, the use of the wrong pronoun, wearing the wrong color, literally anything. Waiting for a society or an art form to come to its senses is a waste of time, better to make a change. Similar happened in 2019 at, of all things, a website for knitting called Ravelry.
The fever hasn't yet left America, or Europe, let's just hope the cure is less worse than the disease.
Yes, there's no reason to spend time with this crowd, to be sure, but rather to insist on telling one's stories, or making one's art, in other venues more welcoming, and that hold with the fundaments of our country, freedom of speech and from compelled speech chief among them. Thank God FAIR incubates writers and artists of all kinds, who can find footing here and then take their work out into the wider world. This much is true: we must keep showing up, standing up, and speaking up. The tail end of the essay describes my way forward, and I hope others find their way, too. FAIR is an important aid in this regard.
Thanks for writing this!
I am sorry that this happened to you. I have never forgotten the high school lessons about the punishment of exile within indigenous communities, and the certain death exile invited.
Cancellation and all that flows from it is, if not physical death, a disabling attack on the spirit.
Some do not recover.
Yet! A writer and artist is a poor target for such punishments. Consider Dante Alighieri's political persecution.
A scientist and philosopher is an even more ferocious adversary of the thought persecutors than an artist.
"E pur si muove." Let Galileo's commitment to truth become your own.
I have a practice of always translating the Latin so as to be as helpful as possible, and to not elevate myself at the cost of others. "And yet it moves," which is a beautiful rebuke, was Galileo's vow to maintain the truth in the face of all persecution. Though, I don't know that a competition for who is the most hounded -- practitioners of science, philosophy, the arts -- is useful to us as a culture. Looked at realistically, each individual harried by the brutal left experiences it at the 100% mark, so the torment, man-to-man, is equal. Research for my next essay, specifically on "Soul Murder," included this focus on an indigenous community, which you might find interesting. https://arena.org.au/smashing-grabbing-falling/
You are not alone. In one or another way, many are experiencing the same thing. After Bush 2 and later COVID and now with the destruction of Gaza, I have come to the realization that what I am in desperate need of is art. I'm not religious but art and Jungian/depth psychology help me now. Are essential. The struggle of our times is to refuse to give up our humanity. Without art we are lost.
The majority conform; the artist does not because she CANNOT. By definition. You may need to create a new art form to use or change the way you are doing it. Why do you need a physical performance space? Can you do these readings online? If it's not too expensive, I'm interested. And please get off FB. It's extremely unhealthy. The push against the billionaire bros REQUIRES artists. This is your time. Do not give up. Ignore the little gnats. I'm a TERF and proud of it.
Bless you for this wisdom! And for the hope and encouragement.
I agree with this. When I was cancelled from the business world I felt similarly upset, doubly so since my value was mathematically and empirically provable. (Analysis here to those that are interested. https://questioner.substack.com/p/superforecasting-for-dummies-9a5 )
But I resolved that I wasn't going to let the haters bring me down. They were my moral and intellectual inferiors, and if anything, THEY deserved to be the ones who are brought down, along with their backwards moral regime. I've been working on that for a while now, and it's great to know that there are other like-minded people like me out there who think the same way I do.
It is very nice to discover fellow travelers, to be sure! Thanks for your comment. I appreciate the multiplier "doubly so," as it frames your mathematical lens, though I dispute the assertion: everyone's cancelation is their own, and given the experience is 100% devastating, it's impossible for the next fellow's to best it at 200%. And anyway, it's a kindness to assume the pain is shared equally, and rational to believe there's no race. The others are trying to take so much of "us" from ourselves; surely the mutual protection what remains is better than a wobbly formula of measure? "Empirically provable" is important and has come under attack from the left, basic biology being a favorite target -- I love it when we can come back with facts for our arguments, to be sure. Equally -- through my lens -- I love it when a story can be told of the sin committed and the hope of our redemption, speaking in narrative terms here, that move hearts and minds to battle this scourge.
Sorry, I didn't mean to imply that the discrimination against you was less significant or painful. I simply meant that it's less PROVABLE, whereas the discrimination against me can be easily quantified into hard numbers and facts. That's one of the advantages business has over art ;-)
Gotcha! I appreciate the wry smile regarding the advantages of business over art. Can't argue there! Wishing you a blessed new year and greater happiness and contentment for us all.
Likewise! I really enjoyed your post, and I hope 2026 brings some good life changes your way!
I still believe you can create. The rest of the world is waking up to the sick narcissistic psychopaths that compromise so much of the 'woke'. Thanks to the filthy animals that pursued you so relentlessly, art sucks now. I almost never go the movies. Never read a new novel. It's all woke social justice crap. Even Disney can't make a good movie anymore. All because they let themselves be told what to do by a bunch of angry females (we have reason to suspect) ruling the world as cowards behind anonymous accounts.
If Donald Trump wants to round these people up and stick 'em in the Saharan desert, it would be good for them. Let them learn what *real* oppression is like. Good luck with that pronoun thing with Sudanese warlords.
Thank you so much Mary for your voice and speaking up and out about cancellation. I've been cancelled by more friends and family than I can count. The hardest, most painful cancellation was being shunned by my daughters for not believing in gender ideology and medicalization of my youngest daughter's body. I'm going through a dark time, and your voice gave me strength today. Thank you.
I'm so very sorry to hear this, and I wish you great courage for the time ahead. The day will lighten. Stay the course.
I admire your grit and courage.
Recently Natan Sharansky sent a letter to Jimmy Lai. Both legendary freedom fighters. Thought about your story as I read it.
Beautifully and poetically written. I look forward to meeting you soon - and here you will find an oasis of freedom and support.
You're an inspiration, Mary. I'm delighted to know that Brent Morden was a help, since he's wonderful guy; and I'm tickled to know that Albert Murray, one of my favorite blues writers and thinkers, has become a part of your personal journey. Murray's "Stomping the Blues," BTW, is just as helpful a guidebook to perseverance and eventual triumph as "The Hero and the Blues." I've just read through your first two essays, in order, so that I could appreciate this one. It's clear that life has thrown you some terrible challenges, but I think you're right to embrace the "but anyway" philosophical orientation of the blues--the "I'm beaten down and want to quit, but I'm going to keep on anyway." I don't know if this will help, but I've written several essays about the blues ethos--the philosophical orientation Murray is evoking--and here's one of them. I'll repeat: you're an inspiration, and a hero, for walking this path and sharing the deep pain out of which your own stubborn determination to persist have emerged. https://studythesouth.org/blues-expressiveness-and-the-blues-ethos/ It's a long essay, so if it drags for you, cut ahead to Part 4: A Brutally Honest Recognition of Reality.
Oh my -- "but anyway" -- !! My new favorite phrase. Thank you!
From Murray's writing, I know you saw this quote, embedded close to the end of the third essay: "The leftist theater community on both coasts of this country stole my storytelling and imperiled my life. But since every day, as Murray told one interviewer, 'is like either … cut your throat or be down at the Savoy [Ballroom] by 9:30,' I’m going to pick up my sword, thank God for antagonistic cooperation, and tell this story: What this movement does is immoral and base, a cowardly, carnivorous thing. Many thousands of artists are suffering because of it. It has malignant intentions for our country, and will rot the heart of us to achieve them."
Isn't that just amazing? For us fellow travelers, it's like either "cut our throats or be down at the stage, or behind the mic, or at the keyboard, or in the cafe, or around the kitchen table by 9:30..." right? Bless you for the endurance to read all three stories, and most especially for your very kind words. They nourish beyond expression. And I am so so eager to read your work and shall do this right now over my next cup of coffee. Because when it comes to Albert Murray -- as of now, and thanks to Brent... I'm with that angel band.
Thanks once more. We got this, and we rise together.
If your travels take you anywhere near Oxford, Mississippi, I'm good for dinner and drinks.
Careful whatcha wish for! :-) I'm consuming your essay like I do cornbread and collard greens right now. Back later with my thoughts. Thank you once more.
If your travels take you anywhere near Oxford, Mississippi, I'm good for a meal and drinks. :)
I am truly sorry that you experienced depression, thoughts of suicide and violent threats. At the same time I wonder how that hasn’t made you more empathic to those who you refuse to acknowledge how they choose to identify. You insult those who who disagree with you and continue down the path of discrimination and oppression of a community that just wants to be acknowledged and seen instead of realizing that your actions and views contribute greatly to your not being hired. One cannot refuse to treat others with respect and value and yet expect it for themselves. Be better and you will reap the rewards.
Men who wish to dress as women may do so if they please, and must be free from harassment; the same is true for women who wish to dress as men. Both may call themselves whatever they like, and engage in relationship with any consenting adult they wish. All lives matter, and all must be allowed to live their best life in peace and security.
I am not concerned with being hired any longer, and am grateful that it was taken from me so as to enable the enlargement of my last voice. I'm content -- in truth, well past content. I am on my final purpose. Everything has lead to here. I wish the same for you. It makes life shine, no matter who tries to quench the light.