40 Comments

Wow! So beautifully written. Thank you for sharing your story and your insight. I wish your courageous voice of reason could be shouted from the rooftops.

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Thank you. My voice is being shouted from the rooftops! 🌺

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I am glad to hear that the LGB folks are taking back what is rightfully theirs, although I have seen more push back on this movement than success. I see the T part of the acronym as the same thing as those who used to push for conversion therapy for gay youth. To the the TRAs if you are a female who likes other females, you aren't actually a female but a male. That way you are actually NOT a homosexual . So they are just transing away the gay instead of praying it away like in the old days.

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Exactly. Very homophobic in nature.

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thank you for that. I am old enough to have experienced all that you speak of as I have been an lesbian for 46 of my 76 years on the planet. I am bewildered by the insistence on lumping together this emphasis on changing your body in such drastic ways in order to fit in to some notion that not fitting one of the two gender stereotypes means there is something wrong with your body; and any of the experiences of the lesbian, gay and bisexual community. (Although I do believe that sexual orientation plays a role in why so many young people confused about their sexually find transgender options more palatable than being lesbian or gay) Its truly absurd and calling everyone queer no matter what their sexual preference is an insult to the hard earned work of many of us to take back the word from the moral judgment.

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Brilliant post, written with such clarity and irrefutable logic. "Degenerate" is so much the right descriptive word for what the fetishistic display at "Pride" has become. The power and short lived unity between lesbians and gays of the original marches have become nothing less than arrogant displays of the new men's sexual rights movement, now called "gender identity" and queer.

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Thanks so much, Karen! 🥰

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Brave speakout against the bullying of lesbians. Too true, even in Dyke Marches, as I experienced in San Francisco in 2018, when a small mob tried to drive some lesbian elders out of the march. The year before, someone wore a t-shirt reading "I punch TERFs," with fake blood on it. No one dared to object. A friend invited me to go in a group (it didn't feel safe to just show up as we had done many times before.) Two women I had never met brought a sign warning of the medical harms of puberty blockers, and immediately were knocked down and their signs torn up. About nine zealots surrounded and hounded us for the rest of the march, shouting "TERFs go home!"

My lesbian feminist friends had founded this march, but now queer extremists, including males, were trying to throw us out of it: exclusion in the name of "inclusion." We did not let them scare us off, but it was harrowing. Those women got knocked down four times, as I tried to prevent people from assaulting them. Where was Dyke March Security? They came at the first attack, but then disappeared for the rest of the march, afraid to be seen as "defending TERFs." When we reached the end, a small mob 50 people formed a semicircle shouting hateful slogans at us. At the Dyke March, which was supposed to be safe space for lesbians. Someone wrote a blog post accusing us of coming to the march "to beat up on transwomen." Many officers in NCLR and other institutions bought this lie and defended the attackers.

Oh: and 2 week before, I had given a talk at Richmond Rainbow Pride on the many cultural names for lesbians, gay men, and trans people.

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Hi Max, thank you for sharing your story. It's important that more people become aware that these are not just one-off events; they are prevalent and to be expected whenever women esp. lesbians stand up for themselves at Pride or any LGBT event. I've never been to a Dyke March and not interested in going because I know it's not the same as it was when it was originally founded.

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All I wanted to do was go to the Dyke March and take the temperature of how it was now. I found out all right. Such violence was unthinkable in the first decades of the DM. The next year the Degenderettes paraded with a wagon filled with fake styrofoam bricks "for throwing at TERFs." Open misogyny, no one protested. One woman did email me in 2018 to say that she and her lover were horrified to see what was happening to us at the DM, but were afraid (realistically in my opinion) that intervening could result in their getting fired from their "progressive" jobs.

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"Queer is the new-age hipster version of being a special snowflake." Thanks for that. I may use it, if that's ok. An old roommate of mine is a gay man, and he has told me he doesn't know where to turn for belonging anymore.

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Beautiful and courageous and strong. We didn't fight for gay marriage for so long and so hard to have have it take a back seat in favor of the latest alphabetized identity marker.

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HRC and GLAAD sold us out to Billionaire perverts and Big Pharma

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I thought queer was being used as Marxist or anti-capitalist speak. That's what it looks like. People who want to claim to be somehow different in a sea of different, as if they are somehow special. It's strange. I support lgb. That's it.

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You’re not wrong. I appreciate James Lindsay’s analysis of the modern, political rebranding of the term “queer,” the origins of which do have Marxist roots. As with most things Marxist, the goal is to undermine language and ideas in order to subtly change culture over time without our noticing, while simultaneously branding as harmful, racist or bourgeois anything that contradicts the new ideas. Therefore, those who embrace the Queer label today (unlike old gays and lesbians like myself, who remember it as a slur) are not thinking about economics or ideology, they just see themselves as hip, enlightened and morally superior.

Ironically, this holier-than-thou attitude inevitably leads to trashing every gay man and lesbian who sees through the illogic of “gender” and refuses to have our sexuality (and our sexed bodies) erased.

Gays Against Groomers has an excellent podcast, which interviewed Lindsay on the topic of “queer” just in time for this year’s Pride. I couldn’t find a link to post here, but it’s available on Apple podcasts if you’re interested in a deep dive into the word and meaning of “queer.”

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Thank you. I will listen to them.

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Right on! And write on!

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Well said. Thank you.

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Hear, hear!!

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You nailed it! Great piece. I applaud you for your courage to push back against being shoved into the "queer" basket. I have told my daughter several times (i am 60 for context) that "Queer" was always used as a derogatory term in my days and I am not comfortable using that term now and quite frankly never will be. You have provided me with a better current understanding of why I shouldn't.

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Thank you for this article!

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This is a really thought-provoking piece. The violence—particularly towards women who dare to question the new cultural norms—is so disturbing but unfortunately effective in shutting down important conversations. As a Bi woman, though, I do have a slightly different perspective on the rebranding of the word queer. Maybe it’s b/c I’m a little older but bisexuality was often denied, disparaged and/or hated by gay & lesbian folk…this alienated a lot of people like me who didn’t feel welcome in the movement or in those spaces. Under the queer designation or umbrella, I think many Bi people feel more welcome than they have in the past (though identifying as Bi isn’t enough for some who insist you must identify as pan or queer, etc). Thank you for sharing your experience and for speaking out; it’s very brave and so needed right now.

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Hi, thank you for reading! I understand where you’re coming from with prejudice against bi women.  I’ve actually written about that topic, recently.

I don’t disagree with the reclamation of the slur “queer” as a unifying term by LGB people to describe same-sex attraction—I disagree with its modern rebranding. 

I also don’t think it is wise to hide behind the word queer as a means of attempting to fit into spaces where your sexuality would otherwise be discriminated against. Personally, when I hear someone call themselves queer I will assume she wants to hide her true nature, and that is a red flag for me. 

A lot of women who say they are queer primarily or exclusively prefer men. I think it’s disingenuous for these women (and others) to try to lump themselves in with lesbians (or lesbian-leaning bi women) under the queer umbrella term. I think if a woman is serious about dating men, bisexual is a more accurate label because the word is clear about being oriented towards both sexes.

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56 yo gay man here, and THANK YOU!!!!!!!! 100% the way I and my husband feel.

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